I’m not going to lie. Leaving is about the most difficult thing for me to do. When it comes time to travel and leave the comfort of my home, I am the worst person to be around. I cry. I scream. I make plans to cancel my trip. I spend hours talking with my mom, dad, and friends weighing the positives and negatives of going on a trip that only a week before I was planning with fervent desire. It’s enough to drive everyone around mad.
On the way to the airport, I’m even more insufferable. I ball my way through check-in and security and straight onto the plane. It’s miserable for me and for the security agents who regularly have to ask me if I am planning on hijacking a plane. Why else would I be so upset to go on vacation?
An awful picture of me just before leaving on my latest trip. I was a mess!
I love to travel but I hate to leave.
And I know I am not the only one. It is common to feel leaving anxiety in varying degrees of severity. The lucky ones don’t feel it at all. The less blessed are completely inhibited by it and never actually get the chance to travel because of it. I suppose I fall somewhere in between.
Anyways, here are my five tips for conquering leaving anxiety. I try to use most of these whenever I am getting ready to travel. (Isn’t there a saying about never listening to your own advice?) If you have any other tips, I would love to hear them!
1. Realize that (most likely) nothing at home will change
For me, the cause of my anxiety is mostly that something big is going to occur while I am away. By big, I mean negative. Perhaps someone is going to die or my house is going to burn down or my dog is going to get sick. These things probably aren’t going to happen. Making your brain realize this is the biggest step to getting past the idea that your world is going to fall apart when you leave. You will most likely be returning to a very familiar place after your travels or time abroad is finished.
2. Plan something exciting in the first couple of vacation days
It helps to have something fantastically exciting planned for your first couple of days away from home. Starting with a mediocre experience will only lessen your desire to leave. For example, you may want to plan a day at Disney World for your first day in Florida or book a hot air balloon trip for your first day in Burma. That way you have something to look forward to and keep your mind from thinking you shouldn’t go.
3. Make a plan with those at home about when and how often you will talk
Depending on who you are, it may be a good idea to stay connected or you may need to leave those at home behind for a while. I fall into the latter category. If I am going to get used to traveling, I need to be without reminders from home. So, I usually wait 2-3 weeks before I skype with my parents. For others, it may be more comforting to talk to loved ones immediately upon reaching the destination. Whatever the case may be, it is a good idea to establish this schedule before leaving home. It will give you the ability to schedule thoughts about and communications from those you have left behind.
4. Have an exit plan (even if you never use it)
If you are like me, I frequently have the desire to cancel my trip just before I leave. Those around me have found it useful to suggest alternatives. For example, I recently left on a nine month around-the-world trip. I was miserable when it came time to leave, so my very practical mother suggested that I should just go and after one month I could reassess whether or not I want to go home. I had already bought the ticket to Asia anyways, she argued. Of course she knew that when the month was up, I certainly would have no desire to go home. But, it helped me get on the plane when I needed to. If you are stressed about leaving on vacation, give yourself an out, a plan B, for after the trip has begun. Most likely by the time you have to use plan B, you won’t need it anymore.
5. Write
This blog actually started as a reaction to my leaving anxiety. Writing helps me to feel connected to those at home while still living my life abroad. If writing a blog isn’t for you, perhaps keeping a journal or writing letters to yourself or others will help you to visualize your fears and as a result, minimize them.
Have any of these tips helped you with your leaving anxiety? Do you have other tips to add to this list? I would love to hear from you in the comments below.
